Now that the holidays are over, the Christmas pleasantries are done and the New Year resolutions are on the way of fulfilment or failure. The next question is, what is next?
Majority of the people I know always look at life as a continuous cycle of years passing by, marked by the changing weather and the 12 months to live by. Perhaps, this gives a little bit of comfort, a sense of certainty of what we inherently know that life is but a constant change. I myself is being governed by the parameters of monthly celebrations, tempted visually by the decors in the shopping malls and the high street, with increasing emphasis on financial expenditure and relationships' vexation.
Such as acquaintances break the January conversations of "Did you had a good Christmas?, What did you do on New Years Eve?" or the next February question "What are your plans for Valentines?", and as expected in the next few months " What are you doing this Easter?" and so it goes on. Then, this puts a predicament or pressure of making plans, doing something, or at least appear to portray that one has to live an interesting yet predictable life.
This made me to think how I view life as a cycle of years and celebrations going by, or to change this outlook as life in a rather linear direction. Where every year is a set of task and timelines to achieve a certain goal. Maybe, what goes on these thoughts has been influenced by my recent Gantt chart after the third draft of my research proposal. Nonetheless, it made the cogwheels back to writing mode outside the PhD realm of theorization.
One of my best friend recently remarked, I seem to act cautiously and sort of pessimistically begin to question things. His observation over the years, a change from my usual ever agreeable, happy go lucky, sociable character. He stated "I used to the pessimistic one, but it seems I passed these principles to you." I conceded and replied, " That's what I get by talking to you too often and spending a lot of time in your company". We agreed that there needs to be a shift of balance in relationships- let it be with friends, families or lovers. One has to take an emphatic window to view things from the others' perspective.
This dialectic philosophy brings into mind, that to civilly reach a conclusion, one has to consider ideas from others, even it contradicts them.
But then, should we just settle, or learn to detach ourselves from others when views or situations does not serve us purpose. Schopenhauer's concept of human relationships of a "porcupines dilemma", that human beings have that drive to get closer to one another for comfort, survival or personal need until we get our quills too close and prick each other. We begin to distance ourselves from prickly, harmful, disagreeable nature of our contrasting personalities.
So what is next, and why am I writing this...
Going back to my first thoughts that I am on a mission to a new way of seeing life and years-
rather than a cycle, but a linear approach, a trajectory of creating valuable experiences not governed by other peoples' expectations but self fulfilment.
On the other hand, I acknowledge but disregard the porcupine in all of us.
To learn the wisdom of compromise.
Yes, people we have relationships with, can be tricky, hard to maintained and often leads to hurtful situations.
But, the shared space and reciprocal experience from a few, handful but quality relationships makes the porcupine quills ( the pricks, life's slings and arrows) all but bearable from the people we care and love.
Majority of the people I know always look at life as a continuous cycle of years passing by, marked by the changing weather and the 12 months to live by. Perhaps, this gives a little bit of comfort, a sense of certainty of what we inherently know that life is but a constant change. I myself is being governed by the parameters of monthly celebrations, tempted visually by the decors in the shopping malls and the high street, with increasing emphasis on financial expenditure and relationships' vexation.
Such as acquaintances break the January conversations of "Did you had a good Christmas?, What did you do on New Years Eve?" or the next February question "What are your plans for Valentines?", and as expected in the next few months " What are you doing this Easter?" and so it goes on. Then, this puts a predicament or pressure of making plans, doing something, or at least appear to portray that one has to live an interesting yet predictable life.
This made me to think how I view life as a cycle of years and celebrations going by, or to change this outlook as life in a rather linear direction. Where every year is a set of task and timelines to achieve a certain goal. Maybe, what goes on these thoughts has been influenced by my recent Gantt chart after the third draft of my research proposal. Nonetheless, it made the cogwheels back to writing mode outside the PhD realm of theorization.
One of my best friend recently remarked, I seem to act cautiously and sort of pessimistically begin to question things. His observation over the years, a change from my usual ever agreeable, happy go lucky, sociable character. He stated "I used to the pessimistic one, but it seems I passed these principles to you." I conceded and replied, " That's what I get by talking to you too often and spending a lot of time in your company". We agreed that there needs to be a shift of balance in relationships- let it be with friends, families or lovers. One has to take an emphatic window to view things from the others' perspective.
This dialectic philosophy brings into mind, that to civilly reach a conclusion, one has to consider ideas from others, even it contradicts them.
But then, should we just settle, or learn to detach ourselves from others when views or situations does not serve us purpose. Schopenhauer's concept of human relationships of a "porcupines dilemma", that human beings have that drive to get closer to one another for comfort, survival or personal need until we get our quills too close and prick each other. We begin to distance ourselves from prickly, harmful, disagreeable nature of our contrasting personalities.
So what is next, and why am I writing this...
Going back to my first thoughts that I am on a mission to a new way of seeing life and years-
rather than a cycle, but a linear approach, a trajectory of creating valuable experiences not governed by other peoples' expectations but self fulfilment.
On the other hand, I acknowledge but disregard the porcupine in all of us.
To learn the wisdom of compromise.
Yes, people we have relationships with, can be tricky, hard to maintained and often leads to hurtful situations.
But, the shared space and reciprocal experience from a few, handful but quality relationships makes the porcupine quills ( the pricks, life's slings and arrows) all but bearable from the people we care and love.
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